This post was semi-inspired by Blonde On A Budget’s post Socializing On A Budget. I was thinking about something on the same lines, but I couldn’t work out the angle to approach it. While Blonde On A Budget approached it from the friends and family view, I’m thinking more along the dating lines. And I’m not talking about being in an established relationship and trying to work out a budget, with your intertwined finances. As Punch Debt In The Face and Confessions Of A Resolutionist show, the budgeting journey could be fun, or at the very least make for an entertaining read.
I’m talking about the ugly, ridiculous, terrifying, weird, sometimes fun, sometimes sticky, world of dating.
So can you date on a budget?
Simple answer, no. Complicated answer, yes.
Lets deconstruct that shall we?
Simple Answer First: NO. Basically it goes with the thinking that whatever money you just spent on/for your date could have been spent on your debt. You suck. Go die in a hole.
Complicated Answer: YES. If you plan ahead, budget what you think is a suitable amount. Multiply that amount by 3. And have an extra $50 just in case.
Or you could go for the complete honesty route and tell her your financial situation straight off the bat. Good luck with that. Let me know how it goes.
Alright the girl/guy could also be on the journey to correct their personal finances, and you could live happily ever after once you bare your metaphorical financial sweat stains to each other. But lets face it, the chances of that happening is roughly the same as going up to a random stranger at the bus stop, stand so close that not only are you invading their personal space, you’ve set up a puppet government, whisper in their ear conspiratorially “I like making a budget in Excel and watching my debt go down. Hur. Hur. Hur.” Then stare at them. And then them going. “Oh my god! Me tooooo!” And you hug and kiss. And make babies. Right there and then. Not very likely me boyo.
Personally the first option is the less painful one for me. Not financially smart, but less painful. But that’s me, I do a silly dance when I’m eating stuff I like. I’m a freak.
My dates (when I actually HAVE dates, which is rare… lets just say amoeba could have evolved into a space faring civilization in the gaps between dates) tend to be marathon conversation epics that go into the wee hours of the morning. Which means extra coffee/extra drinks/extra food/extra fuel/extra cab rides/extra tipping/extra snacks.
I mean I would love to be able to say, “I’m sorry I can’t afford another cup of coffee because I’ve spent $238 dollars this week paying off a credit card. But you’re awesome. Really!” But I just can’t bring myself to do it.
And yes, I know all about the fun things to do that cost little or no money and can still be classified as a date. But there’s only so many times you can go for walks, a museum, and art gallery, to the park, to the lake, drive in the mountains etc etc before the girl cottons on. And I’m not saying that when a girl does figure it out, she’s going to go “Me likey money! Gift me up biyatch!” or anything along those lines. But from what I’ve learned from television (and we all know television is right ALL the time). She will make a mental note. If she’s having a brilliant time it might not be a very large note. Hell it could be downright positive. But it will be there. And you don’t want notes on you. Girls compare notes.
So maybe you can date on a budget… but I certainly can’t.